Today finds me reinforcing clean habits and minimizing poor ones. Golly-gee, do the poor ones feel good. But those poor ones come in excess and begin to eclipse other aspects of my life. And in the shadow of those eclipses comes some crazy shit that makes me lose my sense of self and my place in the world. So let’s keep that evil business to a minimum, shan’t we?
Me and my place in the world. Here we go again. If you came to this blog for repetitive minutiae dredging introspection, boy-howdy, did you came to the right place! Seriously, though, this is the only thing I know how to do. It’s one of my core characteristics. It’s me. When Socrates coined the phrase, “The unexamined life isn’t worth living.” I wonder if he gave any thought to the hazards of over examination.
Moving on, those examinations have me wondering what it is I have to offer. You know, to the world. I’ve managed a decent life balance. Years of training as a starving artist I’ve learned I don’t need much, I’m not want for much. Not bad skills to have, makes social mobility easier. Well, harder if one is too comfortable. My life is boring as fuck, but pretty god damned stable, all things considered. When I ponder upon actions I could be practicing for a more secure life. I’m on a good trajectory now, I could stand to put more efforts into hastening that trajectory. God only knows what I’d do if I arrived at my destination any sooner, though.
I could art or work on the home improvement projects or just clean that very home. But to what end? Art and home improvement projects come with this sad sense of, “Once I pick it up, I’ll only have to put it down again.” You know, art eats up an enormous amount of time and that’s just to be somewhat competitive. Yes, my heart is there, but, at my own peril, reality must be acknowledged. I’ve fought and lost this fight a lot in my adulthood. Allow me to buttress that life a little more before reentering the ring.
Home stuff is kinda similar, in that: time is limited and more so is my knowledge of home improvement. Undoubtedly, any project I come to will have to be abandoned in favor of higher priorities. And I’ll have yet another unfinished project to stare at and feel guilt. I have far too many of those as is.
Which leaves cleaning. Every little bit improves the environment. Many of those straggling projects aforementioned could use some tidying. Boring repetitive work that allows me and my thoughts to roam with abandon. Noncommittal. Ding-ding-ding, ladies and gents, we have a winner.