Bang This Out

This morning has me sleeping in, slow to boot up, and cognitively muggy hours after oozing out of bed. Mood is pretty damned positive considering. Got a slow stew cooking on the stove, good news on a math test I stressed over, the luxurious option of relaxing the day away or investing in work that will make for a kinder future. Either way I win. Morale feels like a mix between relief and zen. Feels good man.

Speaking of, the immediate future looks stable and hopeful. I took a math placement test for the college and did surprisingly well. Looks as though I’ll get all the classes I was hoping for. Granny is still on a high from the trip, the difference in her mood and how she carries herself is vastly improved. Been in touch with old friends, each doing well in their respective worlds. Like, really well. For the next month my schedule is open, or, at least, not so tight where I’m required to be on point. Closer to carefree.

Did well on that test I mentioned a paragraph or so back. Taking tests is a lot different than they used to be. When I read a simple dry basic question, My mind tries to contextualize the question with some forty years’ worth of life experience. A simple “2+2=?” unassuming equation is interpreted with weighty philosophical portent, “Is that 2 really a two?” or “Is math invented or discovered?” and so forth straying into cultural references, political meanings, even love. The answer is “4”. Focus, man!

So too is the intake of new information when studying. In my twenties, my brain was a large empty warehouse. The employees were young nimble spastic go-getters who worked fast but would throw everything into large sloppy piles. The topic of “Financial responsibilities” would be buried under a mountain of trivial cultural interpretations and social miscues. Then, when requisitioned for information, the stock worker giddily hustles off. Digging into lump after lump all the while new rubbish clusters are made and important topics further buried. Stock worker reappears in record time, arms full of possible answers, decidedly wrong answers, and a cat picture having nothing to do with the initial request but because they thought I might like it.

Versus now.

My mind is a library. Somewhat organized, tidier, employed by wizened librarians who, upon being inquired to reference a topic, will ask me to please lower my voice. No sense of urgency on display as they take a nip of tea and contemplate the question before sauntering up to a large catalogue. Opening vast drawers, casually thumbing through the painfully outdated Dewey decimal system, only to scribble down answers before handing over a scrap of paper with categories to choose from. Sure, my answers will come more lustrously informed, but gone are the days of speedy responses. Further, now I have to deliberately look up my own cat pictures..

Cheeky grins. I enjoyed crafting the contrasting metaphors, or similes, or whatever. Lets not get bogged down in the nitty-gritty, lets just have a fine day? What do ya say?

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