Yeah, I drop in and out of doing this. I suppose this is me dropping back in. I’ve kept a journal/blog for years and it get spotty on when I do and don’t scribe in it. That qualifier in place, here I am.

I have a job. After a year and a half of unemployment, I will be employed. That is to say: I am employed. All of two days now. Two days of orientation which was just about 10 hours between the two, pretty cake so far. Today I’m getting orientated on the floor. I’ll be running around following someone learning the ropes for a full eight hours. After that I’ll be kicking it on my own.

Bottom rung on the ladder. I get paid $9.50 an hour for a rough rough job. That’s a five dollar cut from what I was making which wasn’t damn much. Time to take them humble pills and steel my spine. I guess this is the downside of starting over. I’m really starting over. It’s nice because it’s new and exciting and liberating and the choices in front of me are all very seductive. Money? I can earn money? Yeah! Just make yourself a career, buddy. All I gotta do is hunker down and pick a direction.

As of yesterday, that direction is Occupational Therapist. Not as rough as Nursing, pays more, and more respect. That’s hot. I can still be a stubborn fuck and go get that nursing thing, but the education between Nursing and Occupational therapist only differs by a year. Four plus years for either. Not to mention a debt I need to pay off of about 10k.

This is me getting ahead of myself. It’s only day three. The road ahead is gonna be plenty long. I need to relax and be more dispassionate about it. I make better decisions when I am not emotionally invested.

Speaking of emotionally invested. Since last I wrote here,  things have ended with my girlfriend. I have a healthy love for her. Still. I think in the end, I’m just not ready for what she wants or needs from me. Which is a future. I’m sorry, Laura. I meant it when I told you, “You deserve better.”