I went to the group show yesterday. It’s small. A fifty or sixty foot length hallway with pictures on either side. I strain to recollect when I’ve participated in something as modest. Please, be assured, I’m not whining nor am I complaining here. What’s happening is: I’m coming to terms with how I envisioned everything. My personal fantasy versus the reality of the situation. My mind magnified everything into a world shattering event, a showing that would make or break me. The reality is much different.
I’ll still be representing and I’m still proud and full of gusto. That anxiety of not being good enough, that is a feeling that has subsided considerably. I feel more relaxed and more confident. My plans on how I will show have not changed. The preparations are the same. I’ll resume framing after this little posting. I’ll do a mock up of my booth in the back yard this weekend. All products and pictures are standing by ready to make me look like a dutiful competent artisan.
The feeling is existential. This one show is not the entirety of my art career. This show is the first step on a longer journey. There’s quite a few steps to take and a healthy road is ahead of me. I am humbled as the larger picture comes into perspective with such speed and clarity. I feel as though I’ve focused on this tree and neglected the forest . . .
I’d better collect myself and get back on the road. One step at a time.