Well, the semester is over. I am the proud earner of more A’s. You’ll catch me on my lunch breaks bringing them up and just marveling. I am a 36 year old man, I’ve under achieved to great effect for the bulk of my life. It’s nice to have a little recognition, a dollop of validation, posted in a secret corner of the universe. Whatever happens I can at least say, “Hey, its not so bad, look at those A’s and this art is nice, too.”
New work has just begun. Orientation is the flavor of the day, or week, or couple weeks. I will be a learning man for a few weeks.I am at work with a level head, maybe even feeling a tad smug. That’s because I know that, despite my eff ups to come, that if I invest the good faith and earn their trust, they’ll take me in and maybe even keep me.
My excitement is muted, I cashed in all my delight chips before actually getting to the job. You know, in silly celebratory dances around the house where no one can see. There was much dancing. I do recall an extended display in the kitchen when my previous job decided they wouldn’t need me for the full two weeks of my resignation. That dance was both prolonged and accompanied by yelps.
I’m not sure if I should reenlist in school next semester or if I should commit to becoming a workaholic. If I do commit to school it will only be a class or two to keep my academic seat warm, or I can earn money and spend it on frivolous things. I’m not sure how to allocate my stress threshold just yet, and I need to be careful. No one needs me bemoaning my situation, especially one I brought on myself.