Still Down

Yeah, internet’s still out. And look at this, I’m doing just fine. Who’d have thunk it?

I’ll make a call here in a few days. I don’t look forward to the tedium of tech support, who does, but I guess I will. Admittedly, I do debate if I should just shut it off altogether. I’ll mull the should I/shouldn’t I and take my sweet time in doing so. And, in the between time, I will explore options outside the house. I get that having to go to a coffee shop or a library for internet is less convenient, on the other hand, gets me out of the house and away from isolating. Might be a good inconvenience. A necessary one. A little more time, I’ll decide. No rush.

Though I’m wary of admitting so, let alone typing as much here, but I’m feeling better. Do double dip depressions happen? ‘Fraid so. Hence the cautious tone. For the now, I’m relieved to be in an even state of mind. I can recognize positive things once more. Even appreciate them. Sorely welcome.

A weird after effect of climbing out from a funk is a sudden and strange desire to take on all the projects. Fuck, why not a few extra for good measure? I’ll tell you why not, because there’s only so much a person can do. I cannot be all things and master all skill sets. Believe me, I’ve tried. And the relics of each failed attempt haunt me to this day. So, as with the sadness, we practice an even hand on the happiness. Sow us some stability.

School starts tomorrow. This will officially be the start of my final career change in life. More on the particulars later. For now, it’s a little scary, a little exciting, and, dare I say, freeing? Next post, I promise to write some on direction and trajectory. Right now, overthinking feels like a hazard. Piecemeal feels like the best strat to bring me peace… me… ale?. . . I suppose I’ll work on the craftsmanship of that thought, too. You know, as long as I’m putting things off.

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