This weekend went like any other. There was gorging, there was drinking, there was sloth, there were so many video games played. And on the second day there was remorse and there was redemption; poetry, art, healthy eating, studying. Saturday is my “Wreck Steve Day” while Sunday is my “Amends Day”. That little ritual has been going on for some years now.

If you recall that Accuplacer test I mentioned a day or so back, I’m studying for that. My algebra and college math skills need a little attention. I was always good with math. I guess over the years, the many years, my skills have atrophied. I cannot help but think of all those over exaggerations from commercials and teachers telling me important math is. How I’ll need it and use it everyday in every facet of my life. Yeah, turns out that might not be so true. Or, if it is true, It’s demonstrated by having to take a math test for college later in life. Ironic.

I feel cocky about the English part of the equation. “Confident” might be a better word. I read everyday, I write everyday, I have a robust vocabulary. Why shouldn’t I do well?

I picked up a second job over the weekend. It’s nothing formal. Neither is it permanent. You see, in my place of work there was a patient I took care of. She and I got along really well. Well, she has terminal cancer. After a lengthly and exhausting stay, she decided to spend her remaining days at home. And that is what she did; she left the facility to go home. This weekend the family contacted me and proposed I come daily to visit and help out. Naturally, I accepted. So I’ll be spending an extra twenty or so hours a week doing what I can to help her . . .

Now I’m sad. She is loved.

I did not get the poetry writing done that I wanted to this weekend. I spent a minimal amount of time on it. I am in the habit where I give myself a set amount of time to be responsible. If I do poetry for X amount of time, I promise myself not to feel guilty. Well, I did poetry for X amount of time; I feel guilty. I turn the screws on myself when I feel I coulda done more. Only problem is, I can always do more. You can see the conundrum. So, I’ll relax. I’ll focus on getting things done this morning. Poetry will be attended to right now. Just as soon as I post this blog thingy.